Its funny what sleep does to u

I think I need to reevaluate myself, to open up my heart, to feel more. Its funny how such thoughts always strike me at the oddest hours. Like this, for instance. I woke up from a deep slumber for no apparent reason but there was this heavy nagging feeling of regret in my heart.

I felt that I asked for too much and gave too little in return. Its always I want this, I want this but seldom I'll give you that, but I'll give you this. I exercised the rights to gift of gab to its full glory but yet I never gave this much a chance to my ears to excel in doing its job....
I slept too much and missed too many sunrises.
I ate too much but exercised too little.
I feel but not deeply enough.

I tend to take things for granted sometimes.
I never try my best when I was always given the oppurtunity to.

I am lazy. enough said about that.

I'm scared of changes and end up missing out on something.

I use my head too much and neglet what my heart says at times when it is the heart that is right.

I am too proud to apologize for the fear of losing my pride.
I am embrassed to cry in front of family and friends even if I know that they are the ones who can wipe my tears. Or catch my tear drops when the fall.

I love them but I don't show it enough.

I don't like letting go of anything, physical or abstract. If I have to, I'll kick up a fuss, howl and bawl, grumble and gripe or simply, not let go at all even when I am aware that I should let go. And millions more little regrets. My thoughts are pretty much jumbled up right now so please give me some time to rearrange. Funny what sleep does to to you at times. It must be too much sleep hence me feeling like a doofus right now.